The Truth of Team Aqua and Magma
by Larxa the Writer
Summary: Little one-shot I wrote to get out of my writer's block. Professor Birch shows the trainers of the world, how Team Aqua and Magma started. Question: What do people eat in the Pokemon universe? VERY DEMENTED. DO NOT READ IF GROSSED OUT EASILY!


Okay. I have been suffering from writer's block on my other stories(plus procrastination.) This is just something I wrote to get me back on. It started by wondering what people eat in the Pokemon world. Written in a fit of insanity. I really have no idea how I came up with this. VERY DISTURBING, but somewhat funny. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK...

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><p>"Hello fellow trainers!" cried Professor Birch of the Hoenn region. "I am here to clear up the real reason of Team Magma and Team Aqua. Many of you believe it was to get more land or more water right? Well I can tell you, you are wrong!"<p>

The professor let out a laugh, "We professors have recently uncovered a video clip detailing a conversation between Archie and Maxie, just as they decided to form their respective teams. They actually used to be friends! Be warned the following clip is really disturbing to some viewers." With that, Birch pressed play to the video.

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><p>Archie and Maxie were sitting and talking at a dinner table. Both looked down at their plates with disgust.<p>

"Oh no, raw human flesh again!" said Archie as he picked up his fork. He bit in to it with a grimace.

Maxie sighed, "There has to be another, tastier and more practical way to consume it. Heaven knows that we could never eat Pokemon! Humans are the only way!"

Both men bit into their dinner when Maxie added, "Who is this anyway?"

Archie responded, "Just some hobo I found on my trip to Kanto. I think I did the world a favor."

Maxie looked up and asked, "Why?"

"The man was creepy! He spied on the female trainers in Celadon City!" Archie said. They continued to eat their gruesome meal in silence.

Suddenly, Maxie came up with an idea, "Hey! You know how raw flesh is bland?"

His companion nodded.

"Well… what if we….." he paused for dramatic effect, "Cook the flesh!" Archie smiled and pushed his plate away.

"Maxie, you're a genius! But the question left is; how shall we cook it?"

There was a slight pause when both men said at the same time;

"We should roast it" said Maxie.

"We should boil it" said Archie.

Maxie laughed, "My friend, roasting it obviously the better option, for it gives the flesh a tenderness and flavor."

"But Maxie, boiling it seems so much more practical, and it's easier too."

"I still say roasting." Maxie declared.

Archie replied, "Well, I still say boiling."

The men narrowed their eyes at each other.

"Roasting."

"Boiling."

"Roasting."

"Boiling."

"Roasting!"

"Boiling!"

"Roasting!"

"Boiling!"

Maxie finally was done, "ROAS-TING!"

Archie shouted back, "BO-IL-ING!" They stared at each other, anger and hatred apparent in their eyes. Maxie grabbed his fork and stabbed Archie in the hand.

"Ow! Why in the name of Latios did you do that?"

Maxie started to walk out of the door and stopped. "We're done! You boil your flesh!" He smiled and then continued, "But I will create an organization that will love the idea of roasting! It will be called…. Team Magma! And we'll get the help of Groudon!"

Archie's eyes widened, "Groudon? For what?"

"To increase the land, so we can start more fires to cook people! MWAHAHA!"

Archie retorted, "Oh yeah? Well, I'll start a club of people who prefer to boil! We shall be known as… Team Aqua! And we'll capture Kyogre to increase the water, so there's more water to boil people in! BWAHAHA!" The two men left, ready to start their evil and demented ways.

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><p>Professor Birch was quiet. He said, "There you go… yeah…." He added quietly to himself, "The more I watch this, the more I think I need therapy…"<p>

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><p>There you go... Sorry for my demented imagination. Warning: If you start to crave human flesh, don't be Archie or Maxie, go to a therapist instead. See ya. Pray for more updates if you are a reader of my other stories.<p> 


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